Something within – part 4: The feed

Nights here are colder than one would expect. I ended up sleeping next to the fire in front of my house. In the morning, there was still no sign of women. I searched the whole village in order to find some food. There was fish and bread enough for just one more meal. So I went to the fishing nets to find something I know how to use. Some sort of fishing rod and a small hook was laying there just waiting to be found.

So here I am now, trying to catch a fish for more than 6 hours now. They either don’t bite at all, or get off the hook at some point. This seemed easier while I was watching my dad do it. Sadly, it is just as boring now as it was back then.

Have you noticed that in public toilets for men there is always soap whereas public toilets for women are often without it? I mean, one would expect men’s hands are bigger than women’s so they would use more soap than us right? Does it happen to happens to me sometimes when I press the soap button…it misses my hand and the soap gets spilled on the wash basin…I always think of a premature soapaculation…and then I wonder if I should clean that up or not…the naughty side of me usually leaves it…

Some kind of bottle-like vessel is keeping my water cold – I found it near the well in the village. Those women really thought of everything. It will be dark soon so I better get back to the village. Hungry.

I put some wood on the live coal that is still smouldering since this morning. It will be a nice cozy fire, fish and bread – what more could I ask for?

I woke up earlier than yesterday. My rumbling stomach didn’t grant me more sleep. Off to the fishing. Again, I almost died out of boredom. I think I even dozed off at some point. Finally, just before I had to get back, I caught one medium sized fish. Hihiihi I did it – I wont be hungry tonight sir.

In the village, I cleaned the fish and prepared it to get baked. I only need to find some stick to pierce it with…ah here it is! As I am walking towards my fire, I notice some fox-like fluffy animal sniffing around my fish. My first thought was that it will eat my precious and I wanted to yell to scare it off. Something stopped me though and I quietly observed what will happen next. To my horror, nothing happened, the fox-like animal sniffed the fish and got back to the woods.

For the major part of the night I was just staring at that fish next to my fire. I was very disappointed – it isn’t fair – I spent hours catching it and now it isn’t eatable – at least by fox’ standards.

In the morning, I woke up discouraged and I couldn’t make myself go fish. I decided to walk through the forest instead. That turned out to be a great idea because I found several sorts of yummy-looking berries. I picked a handful of each sort. When I got back to the village, I put a few berries of each sort on the plate and placed it near my fire, just like I did yesterday with the fish.

Fox-like animal got out of the woods and sniffed at all the berries. She – yes, I decided to think of a fox as a female – ate the green and the black ones and ignored the rest. I did the same as she did. Ate the rest of the black and green ones and took a long nap.

In the afternoon I went back to the jungle and picked the rest of the green and black berries. I will eat them in the morning if I wont be having any side effects.

Since I decided not to go to the shore, I took that log in my hand and started hitting the pillar with it. When blisters came out, I applied the same mixture of sea water and sand on them and went for a jog. Sleeping next to my fire felt really good this time.

In the morning I had berries for breakfast and then I went to the bank, hoping today my fish luck will change. And it did – in the late afternoon I caught one. It was different than the one fox didn’t want to eat so I was content with today’s catch.

This time I left half of the cleaned fish on the leaf on the floor and this time fox ate everything. Yes, finally some proper food in my belly. Before the dinner, I did my jog and workout. The fish was excellent – I mean compared to what I have been eating so far. Tonight I will fall asleep with a smile…and I did.

In the morning there was some fresh bread next to the fire. I searched the whole village but I couldn’t find anyone. Bread was yummy and it filled up my tummy.

In the next few days I made myself quite a schedule – in the morning fishing and preparing lunch, in the afternoon picking berries, working out, jogging, exploring the island. But I walked only through the sunny part of the forest. Never the dark one. Little fox was often near me since she could find a meal next to me every time I ate. She kept me company. She became some sort of a pet.

One day while searching for new berries, I stumbled on a lake. And what a lake it was. It was on the bottom of a waterfall that was falling down a steep cliff. Carefully, I climbed down the hill, took off my sneakers and socks and immersed my feet in the water. To my surprise, the water wasn’t too cold. Its temperature was perfect so I took off my clothes and went for a swim.

It felt like, I know this sounds strange, but it felt like home. At home I didn’t have a lake nor anything like that but still, this felt like home. I forgot how it feels to wash off every bad experience, every worry, every wound – how it is to be clean and fed. This is feeding my soul, making it stronger and tougher.

After the swim, I crashed on the bank, soaking up the sun, breathing, feeling alive. I fell asleep like a baby. It was the first time I dreamed since I got on this island.


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